Thursday, September 19, 2013

Another big change!

I have once again decided to make the effort to quit smoking.  I've done it before.  I always seem to fall back to the habit though.  I am NOT saying that I can't do it.  I know I can.  I've quit for as long as two years before lighting up again.  I just know that I am in for a fight to break that habit once more.

I have one really good reason to think that I will be successful this time.  I actually want to quit.  After smoking for...well, let's just say too long...I don't enjoy it anymore.  Now, smokers will get that.  Other people that have awesomely bad habits will get it too.  Most smokers keep smoking, regardless of the health risk, because they enjoy it.  It is it's own kind of stress reliever.  Anyone who has walked away from their desk, a meeting, etc., to have a smoke, knows exactly what I am talking about.  It is being able to step outside of whatever is going on and chill by having a cancer stick or two.

As a customer service rep in a large call center, breaks are normally on a set schedule.  If you are a smoker, your body gets use to that schedule.  When break time comes, you know it without looking at the clock.  Your brain and body are yelling at you for nicotine.  It is an evil addiction.  For some, it is more a habit than an addiction, but it is still an addiction no matter what.

I have always enjoyed the excuse to walk away from something to have a cigarette.  It would give me time to step away when there was something happening.  Say the words "I need a smoke." and most of my friends know that I need a moment to process and think.  Several take advantage of the opportunity to join me, since they are smokers too.  Smokers are their own little outcasts club, relegated to designated areas of businesses and other places.  Personally, I get that, since I happen to be a polite smoker.  I don't smoke around people that don't like it.  I know a lot of smokers who are a bit rebellious about the fact that there are few places to freely smoke.

Anyway, I have come to dislike so much about my nasty coffin nail habit.  I have set a date of September 30th for my last smoking day.  As of October 1st, I begin my smoke free journey.

I had put it off till I was further along in my weight loss adventure because I did not want to set myself up for defeat with failing to stop both bad habits.  Well, I've lost over 100 pounds (about 115 to be more accurate).  I've learned that exercise is not evil, lol!  I've changed my attitude and have stopped being so fucking negative (Positive friends are awesome!).  I figure now is the time to quit.  I have never been more emotionally prepared.  Mental preparedness?  That's why I'm giving myself to the end of September.  I know I have to get my brain ready for a big change like quitting smoking.  For me, that's how it is.  By getting my brain in the same place as my heart about being done with this habit, I know I will be successful.

Not that I won't need support.  Trust me!  First two weeks without a cigarette will be very gnarly for me and everybody else, lol!  If you pray, say a bunch of 'em.  If you are more of a sending good thoughts/positive vibes kind of person...send them too!!   Besides, if I can get through the first two weeks of October without a smoke, and without hurting anyone (LOL!!!) then I will be able to celebrate my birthday with some lasagna.  Leave me alone!!  It will be a double celebration...two weeks no smoke and my b-day!  Okay?  Hahaha!!!  Pasta is evil too, but one time in 7 or 8 months at that point, I think it will be a well deserved reward for this reformed Garfield and recovering smoker.  Wish me luck!!

 

5 comments:

  1. wishing you the best of luck! Prayers too! I commend you for doing this cold turkey. Tapering off, then just quitting was the only way I could do it without strangling everyone around me. .... carbs might be the root of all evil but still needed for energy. Lasagna in moderation wont kill u!! Its not like you are eating it all yourself!!! :)

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    1. Part of the prep...cut back. It will be cold turkey, but won't be like going from a pack a day to nothing. Gonna use the ecigs again too. They did help and definitely cheaper in the long run over actual smoke.

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  2. PS~I thought you were getting a tattoo! lmao

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    1. I do want a tattoo...and I already have one picked out but that takes money which I don't have right now. Bills first, right?

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  3. And that lasagna isn't going to taste all that great anyway! You'll enjoy it allbeit true...but you won't go back to it for another year...so...really...no harm..no foul...

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