#RybackWillAlwaysRule

It was an aggravating weekend.  Not because of anything that happened to me, mind you...but aggravating all the same.  Anyone who has followed this blog for any length of time knows I am a professional wrestling fan, a particularly devoted fan of the wrestler known as Ryback.  Hell, my last blog was devoted to drooling over a selfie he posted of his abs...

Yeah, I'm a fan.

This weekend was a roller coaster for Ryan Reeves fans.  Ryan Reeves, the man who plays Ryback in the ring.  His Twitter account  was very active this weekend.  Rumors are rampant that his account was hacked, that he was fired, that he quit...and of course, SOP for his account, it was tweet and delete.  Unless you were on Twitter when the tweets went out, chances are you didn't see them unless another fan retweeted them before deletion.  Otherwise, as most WWE fans know, there's a running history of Superstar tweets on the WWE website.  If you are interested, you can read the tweets here.

I'm not sure what to make of the rampage of tweets.  The rumors are raging around the dirt sheets, online rags and legit wrestling news sites.  Nothing official has been announced by the WWE.  My opinion, best to wait on the official word from the company.  If I had to guess, my hope would be a big build up to a new high mark in Ryan's career.  Am I right?  Am I wrong?  I do not know.  What I do know, I have been a fan, devoted and hardcore, since the first time I saw Ryan on RAW in 2012.  He made his debut as Ryback a few weeks earlier on SmackDown, but RAW was the big deal.  The live show.  The match was over quickly.  He wrestled a pair of jobbers, and finished them off with his signature move, Shell Shock.

If the tweets were a hack, it's just another in the long line of asshole moves by someone who has targeted the Big Guy for harassment.  He has drawn the ire of many a WWE Universe fan because he isn't like all the others.  It's a well known fact that the matches are scripted.  Wrestlers know who will win and know basically what moves they will perform during the match.  That being said, as with all things, the matches are not perfect.  There will be errors, and all of the wrestlers make them.  But for some reason, Ryan has always seemed to be a target of the internet wrestling critics (IWC).  I don't give a damn about what they think.  I have watched enough wrestling to know that shit happens, and there ain't a single wrestler on the roster that doesn't botch.  So the IWC can STFU!

If the tweets are a build up by the company to add to Ryan's fan base before the next big thing happens in his career, it's working.  He's now at nearly 900k followers on Twitter.  On the official Facebook page, he has a little over 200k followers.  Do I think it's a build up?  I sure as hell hope so.  The WWE has not been very kind to the Ryback character since fall of 2012.  They have had him lose all but two pay per view matches, both at Money in the Bank (one year apart).  The company has used him to put over several newer wrestlers, namely The Shield; turned him heel (bad guy); paired him with a manager that's sneaky, evil, underhanded, etc.; separated him from the manager after another big ppv loss; paired him with a not so bad up and coming wrestler in a lamely named tag team.  Now this latest 'drama', for lack of a better word...the interest has been stirred up for Ryback again but so much of it is negative.  I suppose publicity is publicity. Real fans of the character (and the person) are tired of watching the company misuse someone they know has more talent, skill and strength than a majority of the roster.  We know that Ryan has devoted his entire life to reaching the WWE, and we keep hoping that all of this seeming "abuse" will lead to a remarkable run as the guy to beat.  Right now, that does not seem to be happening.  I can only imagine, as frustrated as we feel, he has to be feeling that way too, no matter how positive he may be.

Which brings me to the last possibility...maybe he has gotten tired of the bullshit, and has decided to quit.  From the interviews and other information on Ryan, I have a hard time believing that he would quit.  The WWE has been his lifelong goal.  He got there.  He has had a tough time of it recently, but I really can't imagine him giving it up without a good reason.  He knew going into the WWE that the scripts don't always go in your favor.  He would have been prepared for that and for stall periods in his career.  Unless something really drastic has happened, I tend to think that the "quitting" part, well, that's just a yank on the chain of the fanbase.  Besides, why would he have bragged about a new shirt design and new action figures in the works, if he was done with the company?

Do I really know anything?  No.  I am an observer only, making guesses till the real word comes down from the company.  Anything said here - strictly my opinion.  I have no secret sources, none of that shit.  I'm a fan who now waits to see what will happen next.  Having the fans anxiously waiting, probably the whole point behind this past weekend's activity.  Ryan tweeted he arrived at the location for RAW tonight.  If he had quit, would he really be there?  I mean, being the East Coast, cold, wet, dreary...and he's from out west, from somewhere the sun tends to shine often??  Again, I suppose it's wait and see.

Meantime, I will once again declare myself a rabid, devoted, hardcore, completely infatuated fan of Ryan Reeves and his wrestling character, Ryback.  I have been a fan for two years, and will continue to be a fan, regardless of where his career takes him.  Far as I'm concerned, #RybackWillAlwaysRule!!

   

Ryback Abs

Ryan Reeves' (Ryback) ab selfie

Okay...wanna throw my brain into a total shutdown??  Send my hormones into overdrive??  Have Ryan Reeves post some more selfies of his rock hard, fuckin' sexy self on Twitter!!  Let's just say, every single ounce of me that is female (and I am all female), came to attention.

Sorry folks!!  That man can cause me to become an immediate puddle of mush!!  He is absolute physical perfection, as far as I'm concerned.   At the risk of sounding extremely trashy and crass...Ryback causes this woman to have some serious 'moisture' issues.  I could just start at whatever spot he would pick and have fun for days on end, lmao!!

My cropped version

Yes...he makes feel very 'randy'!!  Not gonna apologize for being a healthy woman with an actual sex drive.

I keep that part of me very well controlled, trust me.  Ryback makes that control a bit difficult.  Let's just say - if I ever got to meet him, we'd both be very happy...lol!

Listen, I'm old enough to know what I want, and have sufficient knowledge to make that happen under the right circumstances.

Believe me...I know 'this' is not gonna happen.  I'm a face in the crowd of millions as far as he is concerned.  It's fun to daydream, but daydreaming is all it is...a nice little fantasy to keep me warm on a cold day.

I do have to wonder...will Ryan ever post selfies of his marvelous titanium ass (because he is way beyond buns of steel!!)??  Mmmmm!!!

My brain and spring concerts

Funny as hell, how our brains work.  The connections from one thing to another.   Though seemingly random, somehow our gray matter finds a link.  POP, you've got one memory,  trailing after another, even if they are not actually associated except in your mind.

I have been mulling over the fact winter has truly begun here in the cold but beautiful mid Atlantic state of Pennsylvania.  Last time I checked the thermometer, it was a chilling 19 degrees outside...brrrrr!!  Not the kind of weather this woman enjoys, except as a good excuse to cuddle up with a handsome man.  Normally, it's just Tink the cat that gets cuddled, lol!

ANYWHO...

Thinking about how cold it is got me thinking about how long it is till spring.  Of course, it's a little less than a month till that notorious rodent in Punxsutawney will prognosticate the arrival of spring.  Love old wives tales...not!  As I thought about spring, I began to think about budding trees, flowers, allergies, the arrival of baseball (Go Birds!!), and then wildly jumped to our high school spring choral concerts.  See what I mean about how those synapses fire oddly??

Our school choral concerts, back in the day, were a hoot - at least, they were for me.  I think any true vocal geek will agree.  The hubbub of preparing, especially if you were a senior, was fun but hard work and kind of bittersweet.  At that point, you have been through three years of prep for various musical programs, most, both vocal and instrumental.  By the time I hit high school, I was strictly a vocalist.  Not that I didn't enjoy instrumental music, but lets be honest, chicks playing brass instruments like trumpet and french horn...not cool!  I had self esteem issues anyway, being a redhead with a boat load of freckles and a penchant to cry.  Being in choir and band, nah...I eliminated at least a little bit of harassment fodder by quitting band.  Besides, I had (and still have) some serious vocal talent, but my instrumental capabilities were limited.  I would never have made first chair.  I was good at what I stuck with, singing.  A four octave range, nothing to sneeze at.  Have to thank my daddy for that talent.

One of the things I loved about being in our vocal programs was sitting in on the daily rehearsals for the men's chorus, called The Tribe.  Our school mascot is a Native American, so The Tribe.  They had a repertoire of songs, serious and silly.  While my brain was doing its random bouncing among memories, I started thinking about some of the songs The Tribe sang, like their theme song Brothers, Sing On.  I have now had snippets of that song, and several others, ricocheting about in my skull.

I sat in the choir room while they rehearsed, learning the words, learning the parts and singing along.  The choir director, a jovial fella named Mr. Kowallis, would look at me and smile, unless we were in concert prep mode, then he would give me a stern glare, and I'd shut up.  Always one of my favorite teachers, I definitely did not want him unhappy with me.  By the time I was a senior, I could blend my voice in with the guys.  Mr. K. never noticed I was singing along unless he saw my mouth was moving.  The guys who sang bass, who were seated in the area next to where the first sopranos sat (and I was a first soprano), would laugh at me for trying to hit their notes.  I had/have a really good range, but not that good, lmao!!

The tenors didn't sit too far away, so I would sing the tenor part to their bass, and we had a blast.  Mr. K. got to where he had me sing the tenor part for them so they would hear how he wanted it done.  I think I did that twice.  Solos were something I was use to by then.  I had a solo in every concert from my sophomore year to my senior year.  Like I said, I'm a vocal geek.

Another song that has been bopping around cheerfully in my head is the song Five Foot Two.  I always snickered when the guys would sing that one.  I was (and am) five foot two and three quarter inches.  Only problem, I don't have "eyes of blue" but I still love the song.  They also sang The Ballad of Lizzie Borden.  You know, "Yesterday in old Fall River, Mr. Andrew Borden died, and they got his daughter Lizzie on the charge of homicide."  Five Foot Two and Lizzie Borden were always crowd pleasers, and they got sung at two of the three spring concerts I participated in.  I still know most of the words to both songs.  Sad but true, and fun.  The guys loved performing them.

The reason for this ramble down memory lane is complicatedly simple.  Our brains are a remarkable piece of engineering.  Whether you believe it happened over eons (NOT!) or at the beckoning of a benevolent God (YES!), our brain is amazing.  I've always been fascinated by how our mind works, and how things like sights, sounds and smells can trigger a reverie of glory or horror for us.  Things like using picture associations, mnemonics and mental lists to remember things, all possible because our how finely tuned our brains can be.  We are a wonder, an amazement, a piece of marvelous handiwork from an all powerful Creator.  He has given us so much, and there isn't any of it that we deserve, contrary to popular belief.

I am so grateful to have the abilities that I have: writing; singing; feeling and giving love...so much to give and to share.  These are things that make me happy, and that's the whole point, to be happy - to make others happy.  It's a new year.  It's a return to the things that please me, that give me joy, and pleasure.  2014, just a few days old, and already I feel that this may be the year I've been waiting on for the last few years.  I feel like something good is gonna happen.  I'm gonna keep working on the attitude I have, so that when the good arrives, I recognize it.

When it does arrive, look out world!

No joking matter

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/02/diagnoses-health-problems-stop-saying_n_4469035.html

I'm not one to typically support Huffington Post.  They are way too liberal for me normally (I am an independent thinker, but tend to be kinda conservative).  A friend of mine posted this link on Facebook yesterday.  Once I read the article, I knew I had to blog it.

The disorders, illnesses, syndromes that this article talks about are very real.  I deal with several of the issues personally: bipolar disorder; chronic depression; anxiety and migraines.  I've dealt with them all of my adult life.  None of them are anything to make light of.

Folks that casually throw these terms around tend to send me up a wall.

Being bipolar is not regretting an impromptu decision.  Being depressed is not just being down about having to do something you don't care to do.  Having issues with anxiety is not just being nervous about something.  Migraines DEFINITELY are not just a bad headache.

I could keep going, maybe write about how each of these issues affect my life.  I won't now, but I think I will devote some future posts to how each one has affected and changed my existence.

Trust me...if you were ever to be on the receiving end of one of my hyper manic aggressive tirades, you would not be so quick to throw out the word 'bipolar' because you decided you didn't like your new hair color after all.  Wanting to sleep in a little is nothing like having no will to get out of bed because of chronic depression.  And migraines are pure agony for anyone who has suffered from them as I do.  I have family and friends who suffer through them also.  They are no joke, in any way.

If you are one of the people that abuses these terms - STOP IT!!  STOP IT NOW!!  It's okay to kid, or joke, but keep in mind that there are real sufferers of these disorders.   There are people whose lives are unalterably affected because they or a loved one must survive these problems daily.  Use your head for something more than a hat rack.  Think about what you are going to say, write, post or tweet before you do it.  Just casually using one of these terms can feel like a suplex from the top rope to someone who must live with these issues.

Okay, I'll climb down from my soapbox for now.

  

Goals, not resolutions

It is a new year.  The last one, had it's moments.  

I am looking forward to having the best year ever.  I know there will be joy, sadness, celebrations, disappointments, fun and boredom...all the things that make this LIFE.  I have decided it is all in the attitude whether or not I concentrate on the positive events or the negative events.  

Starting out with a new job on the close horizon, new classes to do while I work on my associates degree...just two of the things I am anxious to get started on.  I've got my ongoing self improvement project to work on - getting to my weight loss goal is the big one, but also working the decreased me into some kind of fit shape.  

I've also decided to stop dyeing my hair, at least for a while.  I've earned the gray hair that I see when I look at my roots, LOL!  Maybe not the way most women earn them, but I've earned them all the same.  Part of my new attitude is to simply accept who I am and do what I need to make myself happy.  Being happy is a choice, after all.
If I have to dye my hair to be accepted by anyone, well, then they don't deserve to be in my life.  But if I want to dye my hair for myself, then I will.  

I am forty seven years old.  I've fought against the fact I am nearly fifty for a few years.  I am not going to fight any longer.  I am going to revel in it.  No, I'm not impressed that there are things I haven't accomplished yet.  As long as I am here, I'm going to start enjoying what I have accomplished, while I continue to work on doing some of the other things I want to do.  

I cannot keep pissing and moaning about what I don't have.  I need to start celebrating what I do have.  I have a clear mind, good health, and family & friends that love me.  Okay, so I'm still single.  Whatever!!  No, I don't have children.  Truth be told, till recently, that wasn't a big deal.  Now I realize some of what I have missed out on.  Just because I physically cannot have children of my own doesn't mean I can't be a mom.  I've been called Mom since high school.  Maybe when I am in a more stable place financially, I will look into adopting or something like that.  Maybe I'll get involved with a Big Sister program, who knows?   Or, I'll just go to the shelter, acquire another cat and be a mom that way.  

There is so much that is possible.  It is just a matter of putting the work into it.  Okay, I can do that.  I know it has to be in steps.  I get a little overwhelmed if I try to do too much at once.  I'm a multitasker but I know my limits.  So, step by step it will be.  

First step, back to the gym; back to school; quit smoking; start the job.  Second step will be whatever I decide it to be.  I'm not there yet.  

Contrary to past complaints, there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  Sometimes, it is the train...and I have to move off the track for it to pass.  But the shine I see is normally the light of reaching a goal.  I need to remember that.  No, it won't all be easy.  Yes, I may complain.  I'm going to keep moving, watching that patch of light get bigger and brighter.  

Hello 2014 - put up your dukes.  I'm here to fight. 

Introducing Odds and Evans...

 http://www.oddsandevans.com/

The link is to a new blog and website full of all kinds of good things.  It was created and is operated by my 'niece', Amanda.  She has been a part of my life since before she was born.  She is a bright, beautiful, amazing human being, a happy wife and a young mom.  Manny is sharing what she is learning about living life in this crazy world from a young woman's point of view.  From what I've seen, looks as though she will be using the site to pick up suggestions and help from those around her too.

Please go check out her sites.  She has a Twitter account, a Facebook page and I think she's even on Pinterest.  Manny has DIY projects, recipes, things for living green and lean, etc.  Give her some love, my friends.